The REAL Moms Series ~ Raising Strong Willed Kids
If you’re stopping by because you heard me on STAR 105.7…
Today I thought we’d give a little bit of encouragement to moms with strong willed children.
Raising strong willed kids can be exhausting!
Strong willed kids are natural born leaders, they like to be a part of the decision making process, so when it’s not a major issue I encourage you to give them choices.
When we want them to do something like cleaning their room or doing homework it helps to lay out options for our kids.
Strong willed kids thrive on choices as opposed to direct orders.
Obviously this would not apply to things like playing in traffic. I would not let them have that option. That would make you a bad mom. Not a real mom.
Now that that’s established…*of course I’m teasing*
When we want them to clean their room but they would rather go play outside, we give them a choice; either clean their room and go play outside or sit in a chair, in the house-having no fun.
OR, when we want them to do homework but they would rather play video games, we tell them that they can choose: homework and then video games or if you don’t do your homework there will be no video games and you’ll sit in time out.
I know it’s simple and actually a little bit sneaky on our part but we’re letting them feel like they have a sense of control over the situation. It gives them a sense that they are part of the decision which is something that a strong willed child thrives on. They like options. We give them choice A which is what we would like them to choose and then choice B which is whatever we decide would be NO FUN for them. Always emphasizing that the choice is theirs. Bottom line, we’re training them to make wise choices.
It is very important with strong willed children that you stay in your position of authority with them, all children want safe boundaries-even when it seems that want to take over- they really want you to be in charge.
A couple other points: Don’t fight with your child. Be consistent. Be fair. Set clear boundaries. Choose your battles wisely. Let calmer heads prevail.
And most important, let me say that strong willed kids are awesome! They are leaders, they will be mountain movers but we need to help them funnel that drive in the right direction and teaching them to make wise choices will help that happen.
It can be really frustrating at times but it’s so worth it. Stay consistent. You’re a REAL mom, you can do this!
I’d love to hear your input on strong willed kids, any tips you want to share with us?
Listen for more tips about strong willed kids and other Mom topics on the REAL Moms of West Michigan on STAR 105.7! The “Real Moms of West Michigan” airs Tuesday mornings at 7:05 AM EST.
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