Have you seen it? The biggest zit video. It’s awful, truly awful. It shows a man’s back and some of his “friends” lance this huge zit, and for about 10 minutes it continues to “erupt” over and over again. Just about the time you think that it must be over, it shocks you again.
If you haven’t watched it yet, I am sorry but I’m not linking it here. You can easily find it on YouTube if you’re interested. My sons were all yelling and screaming as they watched it so I had to see what all the fuss was about. It is so disgusting to watch and from what the people say in the video, it also has quite a pungent odor. Personally I think it is a staph infection and not a zit.
What does this have to do with marriage?? A lot actually.
When I watched the video I thought about how we let painful memories and feelings build and build in our lives. We walk around pretending it isn’t there, but it’s festering all the time and our spouse is fully aware of it along with most the people around us.
The symptoms are obvious, bitterness.
We spew it out everywhere we go. We complain about our husband to anyone who will listen. We rehearse the past and place the blame rightfully where it should be- on him. The bottom line is that we have an “infection” building in us. The longer we let it go, the worse and deeper it gets.
Ladies, if that is you, I pray you takes steps today to fight the infection with some “anti-biotics” or should I say “anti-bitterness” medicine.
A prescription for anti-bitterness:
1. Forgive Let go, really…for good. Decide that you’re not going to live your life through the lenses of the past. Put an end to seeing the world through the pain of past circumstances.
Col 3:13 Be gentle and forbearing with one another and, if one has a difference (a grievance or complaint) against another, readily pardoning each other; even as the Lord has [freely] forgiven you, so must you also [forgive]. AMP
2. Put an end to constantly reminding yourself and others. All this does is amplify the situation and make it “bigger” in your life.
Phil 4:8-9 And now, dear brothers and sisters, let me say one more thing as I close this letter. Fix your thoughts on what is true and honorable and right. Think about things that are pure and lovely and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned from me and heard from me and saw me doing, and the God of peace will be with you. NLT
3. Go to the Lord in your quiet time and pour your heart out about the pain, asking Him to heal it. Do it by faith, believing that He is right there healing your broken heart. Then leave the pain with Him, stop carrying it with you everywhere you go.
1 Peter 5:7 Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully. AMP
Some of you (probably the ones hurting the deepest) will say that this is too simplistic, I can’t truly understand how deep your pain is. And maybe I’ve not walked through your specific battle, but please don’t think that I don’t understand pain. I have walked through all these steps in different circumstances and I know that I know that God is faithful. He will heal your heart if you give it to Him. That is why I give you scripture, it’s not my word or my experiences that matter, it’s what God’s Word says that counts.
Please hear me when I say that the “pain” that has become your closest friend is not your friend. It’s eating you up, it’s hurting relationships all around you. I pray that you will be able to walk in the freedom that God offers. He has joy for you that may have been buried for years.
Obviously, this message goes way beyond marriage, but let’s start there.
I’m praying for our marriages, Sue